observe.

and i don't want to live if that is how i will become.
for two days i watched you struggle, for 17 years i've known you stronger.
what will i become now that someone so high has fallen, fallen into this trap of so called life.
you wake up incapable, you go to sleep much the same.

forever.

you expectations are solely to preserve your own happiness.
the two words best friend are for your own comfort.
i can see through you and you know it.
now you're freaking and I'm giving up caring.let this go back to how it was we don't need the hassle of another smile free lie.

cycle.

he can't handle it.
you've become like a burdan of a new born child.
and now i realise I'm living among ticking time bombs waiting for the moment this all comes to an end.
so hold my breath because i can feel it creeping closer in time for me to let go and feed the emotions i am now denying.

day break.

would be nice to have something to wake up to every morning.

cold.

so everything never felt so perfect and all with one email everythings in shambles.

where did i go so wrong? why did i let my feelings get the better of me?

I WILL NEVER LET MY GUARD DOWN FOR "LOVE" AGAIN.

In the face of change

That's when she turned to me and said

"I'm not sure anymore"And there

Amidst the waves and the cloudless skies

That blanket the year before

I watch my life wash ashore

Have you ever been a part of something

That you thought would never end?

And then, of course it did

Have you ever felt the weight inside you

Pulling away inside your skin?

And then something had to give

Now the lines are drawnIs this feeling gone?

The best parts of this have come and gone

And now that is all this is

With the reasons clear

We'll spend another year

Without direction, full of fear

And now things will be different

There's nothing simple when it comes to you and I

Always something in this everchanging life

And there probably always will

Now that time is getting harder to come by,

The same arguments are always on our mind

killed this slowly fading light

And now something

Has kept me here too long

And you can't leave me

If I'm already gone

Well now something (hey) Has kept me here too long And you can't leave me (hey) If I'm already gone

Now let's say that something (hey) Has kept me here too long And you can't leave me (hey) If I'm already gone

And we make the same mistakes

We're always hanging on

Break the promises we're always leaning on

All this time spent waking up{Now I} keep this line open to get this call from you{As you} speak the words that keep me coming back to you

Now this time it's all different

Now something Has kept me here too long

And now I'm gone

without.

nothing i can do can fill the void.
even when i sleep all i do is dream of you.
i miss you.

power.

i'm not sure what she thinks she has over me but it seems to have a hold that i cannot escape. your little girl is growing up and you can't bare to let go but, i beg you do, please do, because i will go crazy sitting here inside this box.

grounded

Fighting back the impulse turn my head and close my eyes Spending these nights awake and cold and paralyzed Wonder how we got this far and never realized The common thread that binds our lives And I know you hurt But I can help you if you can...Take my hand And we'll live inside the dreams we left behind Take my hand As we move from this place to a better life Take my hand If you take my hand Fighting back the feeling that you always could deny Anything but everything we know is just a lie As I cremate this memory and watch the darkened ashes rise And beneath the smoke I'll stand and ask you if you can...Take my hand And I'll promise not to ever let it go Take my hand 'Cause this hope is greater than you'll ever know Take my hand And this is all I'll ever ask of you to showFight back the urges Turn my head and close my eyes And will I wake tomorrow still alive I'm still dreaming I'm still waiting I'm still sure You're still living in a life That isn't yours And this is part of meI hope you never seeThis is my life inside your heartTake my hand And I'll promise not to ever let it goTake my hand 'Cause this hope is greater than you'll ever know Take my hand And this is all I'll ever ask of you to show.

tribes.

And as much as I attempt to deny it, the hate that fills this world has made its presence in my veins. If there’s one thing that brings this world down it is the amount of hate that wanders through the minds of everyone who passes us by. The spiteful tone in your voice, the sharp actions of your body, the harsh words that form as they leave your mouth and cut deep into their targets. It’s all wearing thin.

resistance marked as a weaknessignorance masked as intelligenceI stand in defianceour violence has left us with a head made of stone and a heart just as colda youth overdosing on animosity and loathing has made us close the gates and create a beasta being like no one has ever seenwe have made ourselves mere men among giantsmay you stand with me in defiancemay our only defense be letting down our defenselet defenseless left free of all our fencesno longer will hostility guide usno longer will hate divide usno longer will violence undermine us.

rubber bands.

so here it is i will give you everything.

you amaze me you've turned me inside out and upside down yet nothing feels so right.

your ability to understand me even at my worst is admirable and i appreciate it more then you will ever know.

i know it sounds cliche' but i really cannot describe in words how i feel to the extent that i do.

i'll leave it to these three simple words; i love you.

baking

waiting for my vegan cake to cook!

unread.

you're the new revolution, the angst-filled adolescent, you fit the stereotype well.

wolrds apart.

and if these moods swings don't stop i will lose it.

it's like nothing is going right when everything is.

it makes me feel like a spoilt child that always wants more.

this is not me but i can't break the cycle.

48 more days until life will be perfect.

until rise against will bring everything back to me.

they are amazing.

i am getting giddy just remembering how good they were last time.

last night '2'.

I'm in the mood for writing but nothing seems to come together. my minds everywhere. it's at peace with everything and flowing with amazing thoughts.

I'm upset with the way i've been treated by a certain guy over the past few days. i really thought we could be friends but your jealousy and spiteful mind has disheartened this idea.

i've decided i would like to make a difference in each and every single persons life that i meet. i have met so many amazing people who have helped me through life thus far that i think it's time to give back.

I'm sick of being a bottomless pit of vile hate and anger. this will be changing. no the world isn't out to screw me over. granted there are shit people around but bad luck, bad mistake, pick up and move on to tomorrow.

i've found love in my best friend. i don't where how or why it's appeared but that one night i spent with him was more amazing that i can write down. I'm sure you don't want the gory details and i will not be sharing them, all i can say is i trust him more than anything in this world. he has become a person i can admire.

I'm going to snooze now, sweet dreams.

last night.

tonight;
sleeping without you having kissed me good night or being a room apart makes it feel like a never ending chore.
I've thought about your touch and how completely safe and comfortable i felt.
I've thought about your kiss and you lips that don't need chap stick.
I've listened to song after song every one reminding me of a second with you.
I've hugged my pillows and wrapped myself up in my dona that you slept with last night hoping it would suffice. it hasn't.
i miss you.
I'm afraid of getting too close but i think it's too late.
I'm gone.